Thursday, November 22, 2007

working on black friday at home depot

An orange depot holiday
rather does suck
I'd rather be at home
Hearing chickens cluck.
I walk the floor
a home depot whore!
SELL SELL SELL
This 10 % off black friday
is a bustling firey hell.

Too many hours awake
I get no break.
Be nice and smile
how god damn fake!
'Cos I ache and ache,
I wish an earth quake
would swallow the store

so the customer line
would be no more.
Its the holidays
And I don't feel fine.

Be nice and smile:
"How can I help you?
if I kicked your ass
would that be a crime?
can I solve your problem?
give you a deal?

Look out for customers who steal.
I'd rather be home
eating my thankgiving meal.....
Is this for real?

Customers are rude,
I wanna say something crude!
I'd rather be in a church
cringing in the steeple -
because at home depot
TOO MANY PEOPLE!
Gotta clean up aisles,
make by quota....
DO we have profits or losses?
AVOID THE BOSSES!

Thanksgiving at work.
Today is Black Friday
I feel like a jerk,
it just ain't my day..
Breaking my neck
to make my check.
Walking the floor,
A home depot whore.
Mark down prices
Pack down stuff,
I wanna yell at customers
I wanna be gruff!

With greedy customers
I make alliances

when I sell sell sell
expensive appliances.
I set up deliveries
from this big box store!
My poor feet want no more

of the hard concrete floor.
I am so dang sore!
Sell toilets and installations
A 27 cent raise: congratulations! ?

Jingle the bell
for retail hell
Jingle the Bell
for Home Depot Hell
JINGLE THE BELL!
FOR THIS RETAIL HELL!

5 comments:

Anonymous said...

Wow! Makes me appreciate my job! - Truv

Monsoon said...

This was fucking awesome Nina! Do you loathe retail ever so slightly!? Yikes! My warmest thoughts go out to you my dear!

Love EV :-)

NINANINA said...

HA HA I actually like my job most of the time.. just makimg fun of the bullshit that is involved in selling during the holidays.... It wasn't such a bad day after all :)

floots said...

:) :)
you should read this when you have your next "staff evaluation" or whatever they now call them
cheers

Anonymous said...

ninny-u r a funny person-u could b a stand up comedian